morning coctail

Ah, coffee and ibuprofen--the ultimate morning coctail. Here's hoping they both kick in soon. My abdominal soreness is back, and this is the week I'm supposed to be good as new. I nearly started crying last night when I realized it. Taking it easy is so unnatural for me; it's as though when people say that I think I know what they are saying because I'm familiar with the definitions of each of those words, but that's about the extent of my comprehension. A performance addiction will do that to you, I suppose.

I struggle to feel a sense of worth if I'm not accomplishing anything, like a blood-sucking leech on society. Plus, I don't have a ton of ideas about how to comfort a colicky baby that don't involve holding her, so that accounts for quite a bit of my muscle fatigue. At least some days are better than others. At least there is ibuprofen while I wait for one of those better ones.