a clue

I think all of us have moments in our journey in which we find ourselves disoriented and without an articulation of what is happening within us and without us. It can feel like detective work, searching for clues in the musings of others who seem somehow oriented in a similar direction and then assembling the pieces of our own personal puzzles in solitude. I am such a wanderer and clue-gatherer.

I felt like I found a small clue today reading this post on Maggi Dawn's blog about the author of Misquoting Jesus, Bart Ehrman. We saw an interview with Ehrman on The Daily Show, and Justin and I were both intrigued by his book. The Washington Post featured a story about Ehrman's journey from "born-again" Christian to agnostic, and Maggi's thoughts were really interesting. She writes:

I was once a "born again" believer, and it was in part the recognition of endless intellectual dishonesty, both in biblical interpretation and in church practice, that led me to re-conceive my own faith. For me, though, the end result (so far at any rate) has not been the loss of faith, but a radical reconstruction of it. If, like Ehrman, my faith had depended on the inerrancy of the "original texts" of the Bible, I guess I would have lost my faith too. But the truth is that our faith is not solely based in the Bible, and its inaccuracies and inconsistencies have in any case been known about and lived with for a very long time indeed. . . .

All the same, I sympathise with people like Ehrman who do lose their faith, because I've walked close to that line myself, and see close-up the crisis that ensues when someone who has carved out their life around a profession that goes hand in hand with a belief system that subsequently crumbles.
As with every puzzle piece, it isn't exactly an "ah-hah" moment in which the mystery is solved and all that was shadow is now illumined. It's more of a comforting recognition, a place inside that whispers, me, too. So I'll take my clue and hold it tight in my fist for consolation before I go to work seeing where it fits.