next installment

So here is the next installment of my thoughts on this new-found peace. One thing that doesn't work for any person is a cookie cutter expectation that we should all create what amount to prefabricated lives. There should be room to live lives that are an expression of who we are in the world--lives as varied and unique as the individuals that craft them. I don't believe in prescriptions for happiness, or prescriptions for motherhood. I disbelieve any so-called parenting experts who claim their techniques work for all children.

I would guess that for the majority of women in our country, the decision to work or stay at home does not occur as a choice. Many women's circumstances or finances dictate their vocations. For those of us who really experiencing choosing, it can produce anxiety much of the time over whether we chose correctly. But make no mistake--you could definitely call this dilemma a "middle-class problem".

I believe that all of us are concerned with being the best mothers we can be. For some of us, that looks like being very present in our homes and in our children's lives, and for others it looks like being very fulfilled in our lives as a whole--professionally and relationally. The trick is to be able to understand which you're cut out for and why.

A not insignificant part of why I've been able to embrace a more traditional role lately is really grounded in the theological context in which I see it. I don't believe that women are lesser creations than men, or should be subservient, dishonored or disrespected. I believe we are gifted beyond measure, and I believe that the feminine reveals God in the world just as powerfully and importantly as the masculine does. Inside of this world, I can embrace the ways my femininity shapes my contribution instead of trying to dress it up in masculine trappings. Instead of my husband and I trying to act the same way in our family, it gives each of us the freedom to be different--to be better at some things than others, to enjoy some things more than others, and to let our partnership take those things into account.

It works well for now, it gives me a place to settle into for a short respite before the next evolution of our family.