distractions

It's been said that there is no such thing as writer's block, only distraction. I've been intensely distracted for the last week or more. "If you have never had any distractions you don't know how to pray," said Thomas Merton.

Whether learning about prayer or any other discipline, often what is immediately present following your commitment is everything that is contrary to that discipline. For example, I am learning about Sabbath rest, and it reveals my compulsion to busy myself. With all kinds of things.
One friend pointed out that even when my busy-ness centers around pressing into our rich community, if I don't allow myself room in life to just be then something is out of whack.

Often it isn't even clutter in my schedule as much as a crowded feeling in my mind. Questioning about what's next, urgency to make decisions, massive information-gathering. We have been so dislocated by the events of our last six months that it's been difficult for me to experience certainty about anything. In some moments it seems like everything that was once certain or predictable is now up for grabs.

Thank God for one of my shepherds, whose kind words and discernment this morning helped me to clear away the debris and connect to peace again.