On Speaking Out

Our Welcome Table with Tracey Clark, originally uploaded by jenleedotnet.That womanthe precious I've been protectingI Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn't)Brené Brownunwanted identitiesspeaking out
What makes us vulnerable to shame in these areas are the "unwanted identities" associated with each of these topics.  For example, many women used adjectives like loudmouth and pushy to describe unwanted identities associated with speaking out.  These specific unwanted identities surfaced in the interviews as women described the difficulty of navigating all of the messages and stereotypes that discourage them from taking an unpopular stand on an issue or sharing opinions that might make others feel uncomfortable. . . . Sometimes we perceive others as assigning these unwanted identities to us, and other times, we pin them on ourselves.  For example, I don't think any of us would ideally describe ourselves as pushy loudmouths, nor  would we want others to describe us this way.  These hurtful stereotypes are often used (successfully, I might add) to keep women quiet.  We don't even have to be pushy or boisterous to fear these labels--it's been socialized in us.
Someone who speaks out is: disloyal, unappreciative, unpatriotic, insensitive, selfish, angry, holier-than-thou (aka, righteous), disrespectful and hurtful.
Someone who speaks out: is committed, acts in service of others, brings sight to areas of blindness, brings freedom, is courageous, is a light-bearer and a healer.
that woman