If P. Could Write a Poem for S.

Diana Instant+

    There's someone I want to be for you,

    a way I want to catch you
    when you lose your balance
    at the top of the stairs.
    I want to taste my fear of losing you
    and have it crack me open
    instead of making me numb.
    I want to be the rock you land on after a storm,
    not this tired rope on the anchor
    worn thin and threatening to break.

    You tremble
    you fall
    and I can't even cry.
     
    There's someplace I want to take you

    today and all the days after,
    where good intentions carry the day
    and love is the ultimate elixir,
    where not knowing what to do makes me the hero
    and loving me anyway makes you a saint.

    But you fall
    you tremble
    and I can't even cry.

    Here's the truth, if your constitution can stand it:
    I don't know what to do.
    Sometimes I freeze when I'm scared.
    I hate myself for not catching you,
    and this time I'm the one who's lost my balance.

    If I let you see me tremble,
    if I let myself just fall,
    maybe you can cry.

    Maybe you can take us to the place
    where good intentions carry the day
    and love is the ultimate elixir,
    where not knowing what to do makes you the hero
    and finally feeling it all makes me a saint.
     
    Maybe just for today.

"If P. Could Write a Poem for S." by Jen Lee